"You'll be pregnant before you know it"
If one more well-meaning but clueless person says this to me, I'm going to kick them.
My dad called me last night to tell me that my favorite cousin, V., is pregnant with her second. It doesn't make me as sad as the news about my brother and SIL did, but before I could even say anything my dad launched into this whole big lecture about how he knows it's hard, and it was hard for him too, and we're a family, and life goes on, and blah blah blah. And then he was gushing about how V.'s baby and my brother's will be so close in age (they also live in the same town), and then he said quickly, "Oh, and yours will be, too. You'll be pregnant before you know it!"
I don't know why it absolutely enrages me to hear that, but it does. my mom said it about a billion times when I talked to her about my brother's news ("But, why are you upset? You and she will be pregnant at the same time! You'll be pregnant before you know it!")
I don't want to take it for granted like that. It will be hard if we have trouble getting pregnant after losing Joseph. Having my SIL be pregnant would make it that much harder. Expecting to get pregnant just like that is going to make it even harder if it doesn't happen, so I'd really prefer to not think that way. Look where taking things for granted got me, anyway.
Don't mind me, I just really want to hide from my entire family right now.
posted by Muddystingbee @ 9:39 AM
6 comments
6 Comments:
Technically, isn't EVERYONE pregnant before they know it?
hah! I guess that's a good way to look at it. :)
Do you want that list of things not to say to a woman who has gone through pregnancy loss? It wouldn't take me long to find it.
In telling my mom about the new babies and "i'm pregnant" announcements from my friends she responded by telling me that "well, you'll be announcing your news in the spring."
Yes we may be trying in the spring, but that doesn't mean it will work or that i'll want to announce it when i'm 6 weeks pregnant like i did last time. ugh... parents! I swear we'll be better than ours :)
our parents just want us to feel better, to protect us from pain and worry and agony. they can't understand that it makes us want to run over them with our cars. i secretly fear that we WILL parent just like them!
Parents... you love them so much that you want to strangle them sometimes. (My mother keeps saying "Just stop dwelling on it and it will happen" -- okay, it's been 15 months now and NOTHING is happening!!!)
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